Chasing the Wine Rabbit

As wine drinker’s we seek to experience enlightening new flavors, labels and pairings, but we are continuously plagued with ongoing wine questions. How do we know if what we are experiencing is divine insight into the world of wine or just a hoax an opinion that holds no truth? We hear talk of experts with godly palates, and we ask ourselves, what is an expert palate anyways and how do you acquire one? We throw philosophical wine questions out into the wine universe and wait for Dionysus and Bacchus to miraculously throw something back. A wine muse has appeared and it challenges us to find our own answers.

Sinking into cerebral reality to look for a resolution, in the dark space behind the eyes where anything is possible. A painted landscape of fabulous green presents it’s self. We rest beneath a huge tree to ponder our queries, and just as the first question escapes our lips it is interrupted by a frantic flurry of words scurrying past us in ball of illegible white letters. Letting our minds chase the frenzied orb it quickly disappears down a black hole escaping deeper in the subconscious. Hesitating for a moment, but feeling we have no choice we jumped in after it.

Falling deep into the depths of the mind we can see the word creature spinning in the distance. We yell our question into the darkness “What is an expert palate anyways?”, and to our surprise the little ball starts to throw words back. “Expert” and “palate” zoom by. Totally confused we scream “What is an expert”, and before we can say anything words are being whipped towards us: a specialist, an authority, a professional, or a connoisseur. The words stop for a second, but another group comes barreling through the air: to be practiced, skilled and knowledgeable.

Out of sheer reflex we grab the rocketed words that are whizzing by us. The moment we touch them they shrink into the palm of our hands, and for some unknown reason we can’t resist the urge to swallow them. Suddenly there is a gurgling in the pit of our stomachs a churning; the words are doing summersaults in our bellies. Like we have ingested a magic word pill a definition takes shape in the mind. An expert is a person who practices a skill to gain knowledge in which he/she gains the title of specialist, professional or connoisseur making them an authority on the subject.

Starting to understand this little word creature’s game we yell out its other word in question form “what is a palate?” Groups of words start flying in our direction: to have a taste for, to have an appetite for. Still descending into an abyss we are not satisfied and we pressure the creature to expand his word chain. “What does it mean to taste?” We shout at the wordy whirlwind spiraling in the void. A series of words are hurled through the air: to try, test or sample, quickly proceeded by the words: to discriminate, refine and pass judgment.

Snatching the words from the air and gulping them down as quickly as possible we reply “What does it mean to have an appetite for?” Without delay words are being flung into the cosmos: to hunger, crave or desire, which are followed by a second throng of remarks: to have passion, excitement or enthusiasm. Eating these words just a readily as the others, the bubbling begins. We can feel the words arranging themselves in our core, and just like the time before a definition springs into our heads. To have a plate is to taste, test or try something you have an appetite, hunger, or desire for, and to refine, judge and discriminate your findings with passion, excitement and enthusiasm.

Letting out a huge belch the thing that has released its self from our bodies is now floating in front of us, glowing like a neon sign spelling out the phrase. “Therefore; to have an expert palate is to be a person who practices the skill of tasting, testing and trying something they hunger, crave and desire who has gained knowledge by refining, judging and discriminating their skill with passion, excitement and enthusiasm making them an authority on the subject.”

Thud! We come to a stop and are abruptly met with a dead end. Grabbing the definition we realize the word creature is gone. Stuck at the bottom of a subliminal tunnel, we search for a way out. We find a tiny knob attached to a tiny door. Twisting the knob carefully and slowly the door cracks open. Sunlight comes flooding in exposing a beautiful garden on the other side. We can see the word entity getting away, dashing through the flowery fields. We yell after but it doesn’t stop.

We shout at it “how do you acquire an expert palate?”, but the word the creature disappears from sight shedding words on his way. We can see the words lying amidst the flowers beyond our reach. Feeling trapped we hold onto the definition tightly reading it over and over again. If we can only free ourselves of this pit we could discover how to acquire the skill of practicing tasting, testing and trying the wines in which we hunger, crave and desire filling us with refined knowledge deeming us an authority on the subject. Our expert palates are somewhere growing in the garden we feel we can’t reach.

Expressive words and frilly blurbs are impressive vocabularies that can tell amazing stories and discouragingly dance around questions. If you really want to taste wine like an “expert” you have to learn to experience the smells and flavors objectively and separately. I have smelt and tasted many a fabulous wine that to my mind smells and tastes of: cut grass, lemon rind and briny sea air, not a very appealing sounding palate but quite the impressive string of words. I have also tasted many simple unmemorable wines that smell of red berries, cotton candy and hint of vanilla, much more appealing terminology.

Be clear, decisive and isolate the first smells and flavors that pop into your head; it’s not about liking the descriptors, knowing if they are right or wrong, or how many other people smell the same thing. If you smell canned peas, gasoline or barnyard you aren’t the first and you won’t be the last, all of these are common descriptors used frequently by real “experts”. Tasting a glass of wine like an expert is like appreciating a harmony that resonates into a beautiful tune even if you don’t like the song. Like a choir of tastes and smells it’s about how well they sing together in a glass

To be continued……..